If you’ve crossed over into this muddy territory, you’ll need to consider making some changes.
You will need to write a list to assess what changes you can make. I know you don’t have time for lists–that’s the problem, right? Well consider taking a day off work, or wake up extra early tomorrow.
Start with outer changes. Maybe hire a housekeeper or a babysitter or maybe take a break from social engagements. But along with outer changes, there are also some inner changes that will need to happen.
Let’s get back to a balanced life, shall we?
1. Put you first.
Put your own needs above all others. Much like in a plane, always put your mask on first; you are no good to anyone if you break down.
You are a mother/father, wife/husband, sister/brother and friend, but these roles don’t define who you are. Do you something you love once a week. Even if its just curling up with a good book.
Stop taking life so seriously. No matter what’s happening, life will go on; stop causing yourself unneeded stress.
3. Learn how to be assertive–say NO.
Helpful hints to saying “no” without causing a rift:
Tell them “maybe,” then take the proper time to think it over.
Be honest and explain that you can’t commit because you have previous priorities.
Soften the blow by saying, “I’d love to but…”
Give them a suggestion: “I’m not the best person to help you with that because…”
4. Ignore Expectations.
Accept that what others think you should do might not be what you want or need. And that’s okay. You need to learn that what other people love, like golf or skiing, you really don’t enjoy. Don’t be afraid to be honest. Lose your “shoulds” and realize that you don’t have to do anything.
5. You’re not Perfect.
If you miss a spot on the bathroom floor, it’s okay. Being perfect can replace any sense of fun with a nagging, soul-sucking, endless effort that never gets anything quite right. Stop obsessing; perfectionism will only leave you frustrated.
6. Make yourself a realistic schedule.